tea party; for two please.

i often sit here, and think about how life would be, if certain choices weren't made. if things didn't happen the way they did -- if he and i never rekindled; & he never found me again, on myspace.

children. aren't they such a gift from God? you always dream about the day you have kids. whether you want a boy; one who will look out after you - & do the 'manly' things, when daddie isn't around.. or a girl; one who you will be able to share all the finer, girlie girl things with. i had a dream; & that dream came true - the day i found out i was pregnant. i knew in my heart, that there was a blessing inside my belly. at 19 weeks, i found out - it was YOU! God gave me the best present i could ever ask for. it was as if all my dreams and wishes compiled into one - compiled into YOU. now here you are, in my arms - as i am physically able to hold you, kiss you and tell you how much i love you. i am more blessed that God gave ME the role, as your mother. to carry you for 40 weeks, and 1 day - and raise you, as my own little baby girl. you bring such joy to my life - i couldn't imagine life without you. all the experiences we have already witnessed in the (almost) 2 years of your life, have been some of the BEST memories of my life! i will always look back and remember the joy, happiness and laughter you brought to my life. your father and i are so honored to wake up to your smiling face everyday. i love you my little one. beyond what words can ever say; & when you become a mother yourself - will you know, how much I Love You.

friends; when you experience parenthood (& if you already have) you will know the love i speak of. a lot of you share with me, the joy this little girl brings. you all have said such beautiful and kind words, i wanted to thank you for that. there is NOTHING in the world, like being a mother. your children bring out the best in you! love is such a powerful thing, and it goes beyond what i can explain. i love weekends. being able to spend quality time with my husband and daughter, and seeing Raeden interact with Randon - is such a blessing. this time, i hold dear to my heart. it was a beautiful saturday, just - being in the company of 2 of my favorite people in the world.

i hope you all have a wonderful rest of the weekend! i love you all!

ashley xo